here i am, sitting at the comp., watching Let's Make a Deal. why, i do not know. yesterday still seems fuzzy, considering all that happened. woke up today, reminding myself that all was not right in the world, as i had hoped when i finally fell asleep. nothing like double stuff oreos and a good movie to act as a brain eraser. watched a bit of the news today, nothing new to report, thank god. now it's all endless analysis of shit we can't analyze yet and reporters like katie couric (who i can't stand) asking the dumbest questions in the world. even in this time of massive tragedy, the networks show no compassion at all. i wonder if there's some little punk executive in an office somewhere saying, "hey, let's make this awesome graphic of that plane hitting the WTC and use it as a background for all of today's coverage!" Well, there would have to be, because it's really like that. just check out MSNBC. it's disgusting. so i understand why there's no class today, but i wish i did have to go. can't sit around all day and do nothing. but, i'm actually not! today, i'm going to the hospital and and donating blood. i hope they let me....i'm big enough and my piercing was 8 months ago. plus, i'm going to beg them to let me do it. it's like the only thing i can do right now. so, if anybody is reading this, once you're done with your internet stuff, get off your ass and get thee to a hospital or anyplace else where you can donate blood. don't be scared about it, and at least make the effort before they turn you away. today will be my first day donating, and i'm going to be as brave about it as i can be. right now there are people going through a lot worse. ta for now darlings....more updates when they're ready.
Dear Dad, Who knows why I'm putting this in my ancient blog? Why I'm posting it to the internet. Shouting into the void and simultaneously preserving this forever. I guess it's the easiest way to get my thoughts down. Typing can be easier than writing, and it helps me get the words out faster without editing myself. I think about you every day, and I feel like I have more questions than answers, Something moved me to fire up the blog and write, so here I am. It's been a little over seven months since you've been gone. Thinking about the days and months and years leading up to that point feel like a temporal version of the Stations of the Cross. I don't know where the Beginning of the End actually sits in that timeline, but Christmas feels like a good starting point. The last Christmas that we all spent together. Did the tree fall down at all that year? If it didn't, was it a sign that we missed? My birthday dinner in Newark: Mom usually covers the check,...
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