I'm telling you, it's drain bamage...

Yesterday I had posited that people down here might be brain damaged as a result of too much near-equatorial sunlight, therefore rendering them unable to be concerned about incoming tropical storms.

Methinks my theory is correct.

Overheard at work today:

"Hey, have you been keeping up on the storms?"
"You mean Gustav? Isn't that one over now?"
"Yeah, but there's another one in the Bahamas right now. My sister says that it might hit us if the low pressure system moves enough for the storm to move west."
"Oh wow."
"Yeah, and there's two others behind it."
"Two more?!? Since when?"


Since yesterday!!!

But nobody watches the weather reports down here anyway. Seriously - have you ever looked at a South Florida weather forecast for the summer? It's the same thing everyday: infernally hot with a chance of thunderstorms.

Brain damage!

Speaking of things cereberally crippling (like my tendency to make up words like cereberally), I did something yesterday that I have no business admitting to anyone.

I watched the 2 hour season premiere of 90210. And I kinda liked it.

I'll allow you a moment to either laugh at me, stare at me with withering disrespect, or do both then secretly admit that you watched it too and also kinda liked it. Meanwhile, I will stand by my claim while hanging my head in shame like someone just found a Jonas Brothers CD in my possession.

(P.S. I do not own a Jonas Brothers CD, nor do I ever intend to. Honestly - give those kids some blonde hair, and they magically become Hanson. And while "MMMBop" is probably in my top 10 list of guilty pleasure songs, I will never own a Hanson CD either.)

Anyway...

Yeah, the show was horribly cheesy. But wasn't the original just as Velveeta-rific? And aren't we all allowed our own little bad tv habits now and then? Seriously: everyone loves going to a good authentic Mexican restaurant, but sometimes you get that craving for Taco Bell. Or you love brie but you get that hankering for Easy Cheese. Or you're a beer snob but don't mind knocking back an Old E or Mickey's for shits and giggles. TV is the same sometimes: I was thoroughly enthralled by the 7 part Generation Kill on HBO (a must-watch, IMHO), but I also enjoy Family Guy. I've also developed a new obsession with Cops, thanks to a healthy supply of reruns on G4 aka The Nerd Channel.

Hence, I am not ashamed to say that I kinda liked the new 90210. The dialogue leaves plenty to be desired (I was a hardcore Dawson's Creek fan for several years), the plot is way too predictable (hello...I'm a self-professed TV junkie. I know this stuff), and the acting is pretty bad. But it's fun. So I'm giving it a few more episodes before I upgrade it to DVR status.

Oh, the DVR. My life would not be the same without it.

Actually, now that I think about it, I'll be lucky if I manage to survive September. Between the excitement over football starting again (college and pro), anxiety over impending doom in the tropics (thanks to all the storms), and the mind-blowing awesomeness that will be the Best TV Premiere Week EVER, my head is going to explode or my sister will fatally injure me.

I'm sure that several of you have wanted to punch me over repeating the phrase, "I love September" no less that 3 times a day during TV Premiere Week.

But dude: it's gonna be sick!

Sunday kicks off with football, Desperate Housewives, True Blood and Family Guy.

Monday has How I Met Your Mother (the best show that you're not watching), Heroes (which better not suck again), and Boston Legal (even though it was hard to pick this one back up post-strike).

Tuesday is less busy: House and 90210 (if it makes the cut).

Wednesday: Mythbusters (when in doubt, blow shit up!), Project Runway, and Dirty Sexy Money (yaaaaayyyyyy!!!!)

And then there's the DVR-crippling awesomness of Thursday: Ugly Betty and Grey's Anatomy on ABC, and NBC's entire prime time block of My Name Is Earl, Kath and Kim (which may or may not make the cut), The Office (yessssss!), 30 Rock (also up for review...I've panned it for 2 seasons now), and ER (because it's the final season and I want to pay my respects.)

Friday: Are you serious? Nothing good has come on on Fridays since Freaks and Geeks, and that was an insult because the show was so much better than a Friday at 8pm time slot. Friday is where shows go to be put out of their misery. In my world, Friday is when I catch up on whatever I couldn't watch during the rest of the week so I can clear out the DVR.

Saturday: More football and/or DVR clearing.

And then we come back to Sunday.

And I know I left some shows out. Dirty Jobs should be in there somewhere, Kyle XY comes back in January, I may or may not try out Lincoln Heights, and then we have to adjust for cancellations, schedule shifts, mid-season replacements, and American Idol.

Yeah.

Hey, I did say that I'm a TV junkie.

So, um, yeah...I'm just going to go have lunch now, and I'll leave you to wonder whether or not I should seek professional help.

Actually, don't answer that question. We all know that the answer is yes.

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