And now, something completely different...
...to quote Monty Python in all its witty British-ness.
So my lovelife (or lack thereof, shall we say) has apparently reached such a disastrous point that I am now the lone spinster out of, like, everyone I know. To attempt to remedy this situation, I was set up on what I called a kinda-but-not-really blind date.
It's best described as a group setting a la 7th grade, but we were in this nasty little bar in Seaside Heights, of all places. I mean, Seaside is just not my ideal Shore location. And it's wintertime, so there were only locals in the place. And let me tell you, I don't think the natives were all that friendly. It was one of those situations where it took me a good half hour to figure out that the reason why people kept looking at me funny was because I was the only person of color in the place.
*Cue movie clip from "Undercover Brother": I see white people!*
Anyway, back to the whole "blind date" part of this whole debacle. The guy, well, he was ok. He was really polite and respectful, and it was really nice to talk to a guy who's not staring at my boobs the whole time or feels that he has to tell me every 15 minutes how hot/cute/sexy/whatever I look. He's not bad looking at all either. But he's just totally not my type. At all.
Ok, so the rest of the blog is probably going to sound really snotty (especially if you're from south Jersey), so if you think you might be offended, you might wanna leave now.
So the guy himself was ok, but his friends gave me the total creeps. And there's probably a whole bunch of people saying, "Well, you're not dating his friends. What's the big deal?" Well, it's a big deal because you can tell a lot about a guy by the kind of people he hangs out with. And...I was not impressed. These dudes were totally skeevy.
Like ignorant half-literate South Jersey skeevy. Those obnoxious drunk assholes at the party skeevy. Future wife-beater and DUI king skeevy.
I was having nightmares of seeing these guys at a Superbowl party in my house 15 years from now. And being smacked on the ass and told to fetch a beer and more nachos. It wasn't pretty.
Ok, moving on.
The other thing that I wasn't too cool with about this guy was something that seems so innocently cute but actually kinda pissed me off.
A few of the gang decided to play darts, and the guy asked me if I wanted to play. I said sure, but warned him that I suck at darts and there was a good chance that someone might end up with an unwanted piercing by the end of the night. Anyway, once we started playing, it was all good except that he totally cheated and let me win. As in, I'd throw the dart, it would be three inches from where it was supposed to go, and he'd go up to the board and move the dart to where it needed to be and give me the corresponding score. I ended up "beating" him by one point.
Now, I'm a fairly competitive girl. But I also have a great deal of self-deprecating humor. If I know I suck at darts and don't expect to win, then it's cool. I'd much rather suck at darts than have some guy obviously cheat for me because he thinks I want to win. At first it seemed cute, but now it just feels sexist. Grrrr.
The highlight of the evening was actually a cute moment. I was going insane with the music on the jukebox (all rock and alternative a la Orgy, Linkin Park, Korn, etc.), so I decided to pick out some different stuff. The guy went to the jukebox with me and kept pumping dollars into that jukebox until we had a set of 6 or 7 songs picked out. All hip hop and r&b stuff. It would have totally messed up everyone else in the bar...but we never got to hear it. I had to leave before they played our songs in order to get home by 3am-ish like I promised I would. But picking out the songs was fun.
We swapped numbers at the end of the night, and he's apparently going to call me today and set up another date: late dinner somewhere up this way. I might just meet him in New Brunswick...no point in making him drive all the way up to my house, you know what I mean? But I will give him a second chance.
In other news, my job search continues...I see a bank counter and sensible shoes in my near future. I'll keep y'all posted.
So my lovelife (or lack thereof, shall we say) has apparently reached such a disastrous point that I am now the lone spinster out of, like, everyone I know. To attempt to remedy this situation, I was set up on what I called a kinda-but-not-really blind date.
It's best described as a group setting a la 7th grade, but we were in this nasty little bar in Seaside Heights, of all places. I mean, Seaside is just not my ideal Shore location. And it's wintertime, so there were only locals in the place. And let me tell you, I don't think the natives were all that friendly. It was one of those situations where it took me a good half hour to figure out that the reason why people kept looking at me funny was because I was the only person of color in the place.
*Cue movie clip from "Undercover Brother": I see white people!*
Anyway, back to the whole "blind date" part of this whole debacle. The guy, well, he was ok. He was really polite and respectful, and it was really nice to talk to a guy who's not staring at my boobs the whole time or feels that he has to tell me every 15 minutes how hot/cute/sexy/whatever I look. He's not bad looking at all either. But he's just totally not my type. At all.
Ok, so the rest of the blog is probably going to sound really snotty (especially if you're from south Jersey), so if you think you might be offended, you might wanna leave now.
So the guy himself was ok, but his friends gave me the total creeps. And there's probably a whole bunch of people saying, "Well, you're not dating his friends. What's the big deal?" Well, it's a big deal because you can tell a lot about a guy by the kind of people he hangs out with. And...I was not impressed. These dudes were totally skeevy.
Like ignorant half-literate South Jersey skeevy. Those obnoxious drunk assholes at the party skeevy. Future wife-beater and DUI king skeevy.
I was having nightmares of seeing these guys at a Superbowl party in my house 15 years from now. And being smacked on the ass and told to fetch a beer and more nachos. It wasn't pretty.
Ok, moving on.
The other thing that I wasn't too cool with about this guy was something that seems so innocently cute but actually kinda pissed me off.
A few of the gang decided to play darts, and the guy asked me if I wanted to play. I said sure, but warned him that I suck at darts and there was a good chance that someone might end up with an unwanted piercing by the end of the night. Anyway, once we started playing, it was all good except that he totally cheated and let me win. As in, I'd throw the dart, it would be three inches from where it was supposed to go, and he'd go up to the board and move the dart to where it needed to be and give me the corresponding score. I ended up "beating" him by one point.
Now, I'm a fairly competitive girl. But I also have a great deal of self-deprecating humor. If I know I suck at darts and don't expect to win, then it's cool. I'd much rather suck at darts than have some guy obviously cheat for me because he thinks I want to win. At first it seemed cute, but now it just feels sexist. Grrrr.
The highlight of the evening was actually a cute moment. I was going insane with the music on the jukebox (all rock and alternative a la Orgy, Linkin Park, Korn, etc.), so I decided to pick out some different stuff. The guy went to the jukebox with me and kept pumping dollars into that jukebox until we had a set of 6 or 7 songs picked out. All hip hop and r&b stuff. It would have totally messed up everyone else in the bar...but we never got to hear it. I had to leave before they played our songs in order to get home by 3am-ish like I promised I would. But picking out the songs was fun.
We swapped numbers at the end of the night, and he's apparently going to call me today and set up another date: late dinner somewhere up this way. I might just meet him in New Brunswick...no point in making him drive all the way up to my house, you know what I mean? But I will give him a second chance.
In other news, my job search continues...I see a bank counter and sensible shoes in my near future. I'll keep y'all posted.
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