Rocking the Vote, Florida Style
Since we're just a few days from Election Day, I figured I'd tell you all about my experience at the polls last week. I started this post right after I got back from the polls, but I'm going to go back over it and try to get my tenses correct. Apologies in advance for time shifts throughout the story...it's a bad writing habit that I've never been good at correcting. But then again, this whole blog is an English teacher's nightmare sometimes. Whatever. Onward to my story about my 2 hour voting experience.
You read that correctly. 2 hours in line to vote.
So last Monday, voters here in Broward County turned out in record numbers to be among the first to cast their early votes. Just over 11,000 people voted Monday at any one of 17 polling places throughout the county, which comes out to an average of 660 people per site. Polls were open from 10am to 6pm, meaning that anyone in line by 6pm gets to vote that day. So we're really talking 10am to 8pm (what I experienced Tuesday), so that's 10 hours. If you've been following along with your calculator, you'll see that that averages out to 66 votes per hour.
11,000 people all voting at a rate of 66 votes per hour.
So, um, yeah...there's some logjams out there. But why, you may ask, is there such a logjam at the polls. How long does it take to punch your answers in on the computer and be done with it?
Welcome to voting by Scantron.
But I'm getting ahead of myself.
Ok, so I got out of work around 5:15, zipped up to the polling place closest to my house, and witnessed the line wrapping around to the side of the library. Since I had seen this the day before and gave up, I decided to suck it up and just get in line. Besides, I knew that if I kept putting it off, I would run out of tomorrows and be forced to vote on the 4th, losing god-only-knows-how-many hours from work. Plus, the Republicans wanted me to give up since I'm not voting for their Disastrous Duo of Doom.
5:50pm: Step into line ten minutes ahead of the cutoff time for the day. Promptly approached by 3 or 4 different campaigners with flyers and postcards for their local candidates. Also offered a free bottle of water from an Obama volunteer.
6:00pm: Grumpy Security Guard walks down the line asking people if they have tickets. Panic ripples down the line as people look at their watches, wondering if GSG is trying to kick people out of line. I assure the people around me that we got there before 6, so we get to vote (while preparing to dig in my heels and raise a holy fit if anyone tries to tell me to go home).
6:02pm: GSG walks by again handing out "tickets," numbers written on scrap paper. I am number 700.
6:05pm: I pull out my book and begin to kill time. I grow increasingly irritated with the woman standing behind me who has no concept of personal space.
I'm going to take a time out to address this issue of personal space. If you have problems with complete strangers invading your personal space, do not move to South Florida. Trust me on this one. Now I'm not an anti-people person or anything. I understand that there are times when you're going to be all up in someone's personal space under circumstances beyond your control. A crowded dance floor or concert hall - you will be surrounded by people you don't know. Crowded bus or subway - you will be mashed against other people. A crowded airplane (shudder) - mere inches between you and the people around you.
But it's something that people can't control.
However...
If I'm standing in line at the Publix or the Target, I generally put two to three feet between the person in front of me and myself. There's no need to crowd them. But the person behind me will stand only 6 inches behind me! Like, so close that I can feel them breathing on me! And if inch up a tiny bit to get some space, they scoot right on up behind me! I always wish that I would have an attack of wicked gas so I could rip a giant fart and force the person to back up...but I have yet to be in such a position to do so. Other times I've had to grit my teeth just to keep myself from turing around and telling the person to back the eff up. But seriously, people. Let's all try to teach each other the 2 foot rule.
Moving on then...
6:33pm: Text to my sister, "Grrrr. Why do I always get stuck in lines with people who have NO CONCEPT of personal space?!?"
7:12pm: Text to my sister, "I HAVEN'T MOVED since that last text. Oops. Just moved 6 feet. This is ridiculous!" My sister then explained why the line was moving so slowly, but I'll reveal that later. I should also note that by this time I have allowed the 3 pushy ladies behind me with the space issues to inch on up past me and essentially cut me in line. I decide that this is better than having them stand so close behind me that they could probably read the text I had sent to my sister regarding this very issue.
7:25pm: Now on the sidewalk in front of the library, directly in front of the handicapped parking spots. Anyone from South Florida knows that this is not a good place for anyone to linger for any length of time, as elderly drivers crashing into buildings is practically a daily occurence down here. Case in point: I went to our local newspaper's website to get the details on an accident last Monday where a 75 year old woman drove her car off the 2nd floor of a parking garage (both she and the passenger were unharmed). Before I could pull that story up, I found another story from Tuesday reporting that an 88 year old man (whose licence was revoked that morning after being suspended since 2006 for failure to pass a license exam) crashed his car into his condo building, knocking out balcony supports and forcing the evacuation of nine other units until structural engineers can determine how much damage has been done to the building. So, um, yeah...no one wanted to be standing right in front of the "danger zone," especially while no fewer that 3 senior citizens pulled in and out of the handicapped spots. Fortunately, we all escaped with our lives and limbs intact.
7:30pm: Some asshat drives past the library and yells "Obama sucks!" out the window. I mutter under my breath, "Thanks! Don't forget to vote on the 5th!" The lady behind me hears this and gets a good chuckle at it.
7:50pm: Finally out of the danger zone of iminent death (in front of the handicapped spots), I can see the door of the library. Our favorite security guard is calling out numbers in groups of five.
7:55pm: "...698, 699, 700..." My number's been called! Hooray! Into the library I go...to wait in line some more. Then I get to find out what's been taking so flipping long.
8:00pm: My identity has been verified, and I wait for my ballot to be printed.
Each ballot is printed individually. One at a time.
That was what had been causing the wait! Since any Broward County resident can vote at any of the 17 early voting locations, each ballot has to be individually printed according to the voter's precinct since different cities have different initiatives that they may be voting on.
I recieve my ballot and proceed to the booth.
8:03pm: I fill in the first bubble on the first page, carefully and decisively casting my vote for Barack Obama. I take a moment to look at what I've just done and think about what it's taken for us to get here. All of us, as Americans. I just casted a vote for the man that very well might become the first black president of the United States.
Awesome, isn't it? But there's no time to dilly dally...there's 4 pages of bubbles to fill in. 4. Pages. For sherrifs and circuit court judges and constitutional amendments and all sorts of other crap.
8:10pm: I take one last look at my ballot and one last look at my presidential vote. I head up to the scanner, feed my ballot into the machine...and I'm done.
My 9 month journey through all of this political insanity was finished. Now all that there is left to do is wait.
So that was my experience at the polls. Again, I encourage all of you to early vote if you can, get to the polls early if you can't, and just vote. I don't care if there is a torrential downpour happening or an epic nor'easter or blazing heat or nasty blizzard. I don't care if you have a little cold or you just don't feel like going out that day. You have no excuse. If I survived multiple invasions of my personal space and cheated death by an old guy forgetting which pedal was the brake, you can overcome much worse and get your ass to the polls.
Please vote.
You read that correctly. 2 hours in line to vote.
So last Monday, voters here in Broward County turned out in record numbers to be among the first to cast their early votes. Just over 11,000 people voted Monday at any one of 17 polling places throughout the county, which comes out to an average of 660 people per site. Polls were open from 10am to 6pm, meaning that anyone in line by 6pm gets to vote that day. So we're really talking 10am to 8pm (what I experienced Tuesday), so that's 10 hours. If you've been following along with your calculator, you'll see that that averages out to 66 votes per hour.
11,000 people all voting at a rate of 66 votes per hour.
So, um, yeah...there's some logjams out there. But why, you may ask, is there such a logjam at the polls. How long does it take to punch your answers in on the computer and be done with it?
Welcome to voting by Scantron.
But I'm getting ahead of myself.
Ok, so I got out of work around 5:15, zipped up to the polling place closest to my house, and witnessed the line wrapping around to the side of the library. Since I had seen this the day before and gave up, I decided to suck it up and just get in line. Besides, I knew that if I kept putting it off, I would run out of tomorrows and be forced to vote on the 4th, losing god-only-knows-how-many hours from work. Plus, the Republicans wanted me to give up since I'm not voting for their Disastrous Duo of Doom.
5:50pm: Step into line ten minutes ahead of the cutoff time for the day. Promptly approached by 3 or 4 different campaigners with flyers and postcards for their local candidates. Also offered a free bottle of water from an Obama volunteer.
6:00pm: Grumpy Security Guard walks down the line asking people if they have tickets. Panic ripples down the line as people look at their watches, wondering if GSG is trying to kick people out of line. I assure the people around me that we got there before 6, so we get to vote (while preparing to dig in my heels and raise a holy fit if anyone tries to tell me to go home).
6:02pm: GSG walks by again handing out "tickets," numbers written on scrap paper. I am number 700.
6:05pm: I pull out my book and begin to kill time. I grow increasingly irritated with the woman standing behind me who has no concept of personal space.
I'm going to take a time out to address this issue of personal space. If you have problems with complete strangers invading your personal space, do not move to South Florida. Trust me on this one. Now I'm not an anti-people person or anything. I understand that there are times when you're going to be all up in someone's personal space under circumstances beyond your control. A crowded dance floor or concert hall - you will be surrounded by people you don't know. Crowded bus or subway - you will be mashed against other people. A crowded airplane (shudder) - mere inches between you and the people around you.
But it's something that people can't control.
However...
If I'm standing in line at the Publix or the Target, I generally put two to three feet between the person in front of me and myself. There's no need to crowd them. But the person behind me will stand only 6 inches behind me! Like, so close that I can feel them breathing on me! And if inch up a tiny bit to get some space, they scoot right on up behind me! I always wish that I would have an attack of wicked gas so I could rip a giant fart and force the person to back up...but I have yet to be in such a position to do so. Other times I've had to grit my teeth just to keep myself from turing around and telling the person to back the eff up. But seriously, people. Let's all try to teach each other the 2 foot rule.
Moving on then...
6:33pm: Text to my sister, "Grrrr. Why do I always get stuck in lines with people who have NO CONCEPT of personal space?!?"
7:12pm: Text to my sister, "I HAVEN'T MOVED since that last text. Oops. Just moved 6 feet. This is ridiculous!" My sister then explained why the line was moving so slowly, but I'll reveal that later. I should also note that by this time I have allowed the 3 pushy ladies behind me with the space issues to inch on up past me and essentially cut me in line. I decide that this is better than having them stand so close behind me that they could probably read the text I had sent to my sister regarding this very issue.
7:25pm: Now on the sidewalk in front of the library, directly in front of the handicapped parking spots. Anyone from South Florida knows that this is not a good place for anyone to linger for any length of time, as elderly drivers crashing into buildings is practically a daily occurence down here. Case in point: I went to our local newspaper's website to get the details on an accident last Monday where a 75 year old woman drove her car off the 2nd floor of a parking garage (both she and the passenger were unharmed). Before I could pull that story up, I found another story from Tuesday reporting that an 88 year old man (whose licence was revoked that morning after being suspended since 2006 for failure to pass a license exam) crashed his car into his condo building, knocking out balcony supports and forcing the evacuation of nine other units until structural engineers can determine how much damage has been done to the building. So, um, yeah...no one wanted to be standing right in front of the "danger zone," especially while no fewer that 3 senior citizens pulled in and out of the handicapped spots. Fortunately, we all escaped with our lives and limbs intact.
7:30pm: Some asshat drives past the library and yells "Obama sucks!" out the window. I mutter under my breath, "Thanks! Don't forget to vote on the 5th!" The lady behind me hears this and gets a good chuckle at it.
7:50pm: Finally out of the danger zone of iminent death (in front of the handicapped spots), I can see the door of the library. Our favorite security guard is calling out numbers in groups of five.
7:55pm: "...698, 699, 700..." My number's been called! Hooray! Into the library I go...to wait in line some more. Then I get to find out what's been taking so flipping long.
8:00pm: My identity has been verified, and I wait for my ballot to be printed.
Each ballot is printed individually. One at a time.
That was what had been causing the wait! Since any Broward County resident can vote at any of the 17 early voting locations, each ballot has to be individually printed according to the voter's precinct since different cities have different initiatives that they may be voting on.
I recieve my ballot and proceed to the booth.
8:03pm: I fill in the first bubble on the first page, carefully and decisively casting my vote for Barack Obama. I take a moment to look at what I've just done and think about what it's taken for us to get here. All of us, as Americans. I just casted a vote for the man that very well might become the first black president of the United States.
Awesome, isn't it? But there's no time to dilly dally...there's 4 pages of bubbles to fill in. 4. Pages. For sherrifs and circuit court judges and constitutional amendments and all sorts of other crap.
8:10pm: I take one last look at my ballot and one last look at my presidential vote. I head up to the scanner, feed my ballot into the machine...and I'm done.
My 9 month journey through all of this political insanity was finished. Now all that there is left to do is wait.
So that was my experience at the polls. Again, I encourage all of you to early vote if you can, get to the polls early if you can't, and just vote. I don't care if there is a torrential downpour happening or an epic nor'easter or blazing heat or nasty blizzard. I don't care if you have a little cold or you just don't feel like going out that day. You have no excuse. If I survived multiple invasions of my personal space and cheated death by an old guy forgetting which pedal was the brake, you can overcome much worse and get your ass to the polls.
Please vote.
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