drama drama and more drama....*sigh*. i should be sleeping, but i am too stressed. but i don't know why i'm stressed. so i failed my expos paper....wanted to cry, but couldn't. too pissed to cry. if you only knew how hard i worked on that paper.....
but that's not why i'm stressed ( i think).
you know what i was thinking about tonight? i was thinking about the stupidest thing. i was thinking about how i never got to go to my prom in high school. isn't that pathetic? here i am, a sophomore in college, and i'm dwelling on why ididn't get to go to my prom. i easily could have gone, surely. but why in the hell would i get all dressed up to go to the prom by myself? yeah, by myself. i didn't have a date, and all of my friends already had dates. so i couldn't go with a group of friends. and with the way my school was, you did not just go to the prom by yourself. so i didn't go. i had no one to ask, and no one asked me. i think that's what my big issue is here. not a single boy asked me to the prom, or even asked if i was going. isn't that horrible? i mean, i've always got people telling me how cute and pretty i am and how i'm such a sweet person. but i didn't get asked to the prom. why? what was it about me? i don't get it. i mean, i know i shouldn't make such a big deal about it. it's just a stupid dance, right? but there's so much to the whole thing that i ended up missing out on. getting asked, getting the tickets, picking out a dress, taking all the pictures, riding in the limo, showing everyone how pretty you look in your dress, talking about it with your friends on monday, the stupid little keepsakes that you save so you can show them off at college...everything. i feel cheated, which is really stupid. i mean, i hated my high school. everyone was so shallow and materialistic...barely anyone paid attention to me anyway...so why do i care so much? and why did i start caring now? and why the fuck am i crying over this?it's so ridiculous to be crying over something that can't be fixed. high school was over forever ago, and i can't go back (thank god). but it took me a year and a half to freak out over not having a date to the prom. i guess i wish someone would tell me why. why no one asked me, and why does it hurt so much? ok, this is getting really pathetic and sad and ridiculous, not to mention that i have a class in less than 5 hours and i still haven't gone to bed yet. sorry to depress you all once again...i didn't do it to make you feel sorry for me, i just had to work out some of the shit that's been eating me up inside. g'nite, morning, whatever....see ya all later.
but that's not why i'm stressed ( i think).
you know what i was thinking about tonight? i was thinking about the stupidest thing. i was thinking about how i never got to go to my prom in high school. isn't that pathetic? here i am, a sophomore in college, and i'm dwelling on why ididn't get to go to my prom. i easily could have gone, surely. but why in the hell would i get all dressed up to go to the prom by myself? yeah, by myself. i didn't have a date, and all of my friends already had dates. so i couldn't go with a group of friends. and with the way my school was, you did not just go to the prom by yourself. so i didn't go. i had no one to ask, and no one asked me. i think that's what my big issue is here. not a single boy asked me to the prom, or even asked if i was going. isn't that horrible? i mean, i've always got people telling me how cute and pretty i am and how i'm such a sweet person. but i didn't get asked to the prom. why? what was it about me? i don't get it. i mean, i know i shouldn't make such a big deal about it. it's just a stupid dance, right? but there's so much to the whole thing that i ended up missing out on. getting asked, getting the tickets, picking out a dress, taking all the pictures, riding in the limo, showing everyone how pretty you look in your dress, talking about it with your friends on monday, the stupid little keepsakes that you save so you can show them off at college...everything. i feel cheated, which is really stupid. i mean, i hated my high school. everyone was so shallow and materialistic...barely anyone paid attention to me anyway...so why do i care so much? and why did i start caring now? and why the fuck am i crying over this?it's so ridiculous to be crying over something that can't be fixed. high school was over forever ago, and i can't go back (thank god). but it took me a year and a half to freak out over not having a date to the prom. i guess i wish someone would tell me why. why no one asked me, and why does it hurt so much? ok, this is getting really pathetic and sad and ridiculous, not to mention that i have a class in less than 5 hours and i still haven't gone to bed yet. sorry to depress you all once again...i didn't do it to make you feel sorry for me, i just had to work out some of the shit that's been eating me up inside. g'nite, morning, whatever....see ya all later.
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